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Decisions, Decisions: Six Tips to Nurture a Confident Decision Maker BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES A s a parent, you've probably heard the mantra: To help your child feel a sense of control and better manage meltdowns, offer two choices you can both live with. But, what do you do if even two choices become an agonizing struggle as your child painstakingly worries over seemingly simple decisions? Kristen de la Durantaye says her son Taven, 7, finds decision-making extremely difficult, from choosing what to eat for breakfast in the morning to which toy car to pick out at the store. Why? Taven says, "I don't want to make the wrong choice." "This is painful because it takes so long to decide. I don't make the first thing he wants for breakfast because I know he will change his mind at least twice before landing on his final decision,"de la Durantaye says. Dr. Jane Sosland, a clinical psychologist in behavioral pediatrics at The University of Kansas Hospital, says decision-making occurs in the area of the brain that handles problem-solving. While we're all born with the ability to make decisions, our environment and personality can influence our confidence when weighing options. "A child who is particularly anxious or worried or cares a lot about what other people think, may be one who is much more careful about making decisions," Sosland says. 34 Fredericksburg Parent and Family • October 2013