Everyone else's kid is smiling for their first day of school picture, what in the world is the problem with mine? Unfortunately that was the least of my concerns trying to get Asha to just get on the school bus. It started out well, she was excited to pick out a backpack, thrilled to possibly sit with her brother on the school bus and she picked out a new dress for her first day of school. We shopped for lunch box snacks, we made back to school cookies and we talked about how lucky she was to go to a great school with a teacher we've heard so much about and with so kids from the neighborhood who will be at the same school. It was all well and good until the first day.
She got up and dressed and she appeared somewhat excited until she came downstairs for breakfast. Then she asked if she had to stay as long as Rohan (YES!), could I pick her up early (NO!), could she pick a day to miss (NO!), could I come and have lunch with her (NO!) and it went downhill from there. She refused to give me that smiling shot that I wanted to capture. My sister commented that it looked like a mug shot when I posted her picture holding the sign commemorating her special day. I explained it was the best one I could get and I was not going to let that determine whether I chose to post her picture on Facebook!
The walk to the bus was tentative at best as she decided en route that she did not want to go to school. Then the tears and I started feeling tentative myself. The kids at the bus stop rallied around her and she stopped long enough to try to climb a tree but then the bus rolled up a few minutes late and she tearfully refused to get on the bus. I had flashbacks of going through this with my son...how come it's so easy for everyone else? I was already sad about her being sad, the bus driver was late and Asha was determined not to get on so we walked home and her dad and I drove her to school as she tearfully told us how much she just did not want to go.
Her tears never subsided as we walked to her classroom and they reached a new level once we got there. She cried repeatedly, "Mommy please don't leave me." As my sister would say, OMG, shoot me now. It was heart breaking. We tore ourselves away and went to wait for a few minutes down a hallway where I broke down too. It's an awful feeling to leave your baby like in that state. My husband was rational, his mantra was “it’s a great school, she has wonderful teacher, she'll be fine.” We got a text an hour letter from her teacher telling us she was doing very well, we also heard from a friend who teaches at the school reporting the same thing. That was a relief but it was still a nerve-wracking day. When 3:30 pm came, her dad and I picked her up and her mood was entirely different.
Her first words when she saw us, "No homework but we got candy, best day ever!" So I wasted my day being down in the dumps for nothing? She was ebullient and happy to talk about her day and how much fun she had. Whew, what a relief!
Until the next morning that is...she was slightly congested "because a girl named Daisy had a croupy cough and sat next to her" so she didn't think she could go to school. I took her temperature twice, it was fine. We gave her some Afrin for her sniffles, there was no cough at all and told her she had to go. The tears were immediate; she was not going to take off her pajamas. She was not going to go...again, she refused to even leave the house for the bus but I drove her to school. Again, she was crying when I left and again, I was down in the dumps all day worrying about her. We heard she was fine and her brother checked up on her. She was good when I picked her up but after two days of school, it's the weekend and next week we'll have five days plus her dad will be out of town.
I'm dreading it but I know I'll put on a good front and of course she loves it once she gets there. She won't take the bus and I'm fine driving her although my husband thinks we should just carry her on like we did with our son. If he does that, I don't think I can watch. All I know is she is happy once she is there but she never wants to go back and she cries every morning. She tears up every time we talk about her going to school and she has said she'll lock herself in her room forever so she never has to go...only five years old and so much drama. I'm going to try to enjoy Sunday but I'm dreading Monday morning.