Add One Pinch of Mommy Guilt and Stir Well

November 12, 2013

My trip to India was very easy and comfortable (hey, business class, remember?!) but we landed in crazy, crowded Mumbai and I'm beginning to wonder why I left my kids for this chaos. My sister and I checked into the hotel (one of very few nights in a hotel since most of our time will be spent with family) and we made our first Skype call.

I was thrilled to see my husband's face pop up on the screen; has been barely 48 hours but I miss him already. But when Rishi and Reeya's faces appeared, I think my heart skipped a beat. I wanted to climb through that screen. What the hell was I thinking leaving them?

ameeta3Reeya's first question was, "Are you coming home tonight, Mommy?" Oh my goodness, I felt so bad. They were at my mom's during our call, I didn't get to talk to her much but turns out they were busy coloring and doing crafts with my mother...the best mother (one who probably never left her kids) in the world!

Rishi stayed home today, he is feeling better then when Mean Mommy (me) left him yesterday. He was excited about his coloring book that he made with Nani. Reeya just wanted to know when I'll be back. Okay so clearly Skype is a mixed blessing. It's amazing to see them from halfway across the world but we hang up and I'm sad for a long time...long enough where I think I want to call instead of Skyping next time.

I'm still counting all the significant events I'll be missing, most notably Rishi's first award in Kindergarten, which is a science award, I am SO proud and excited since this is going to be a surprise for him until it happens. I so totally should not be missing this and I want to know if I can watch via Skype from here. My husband does not seem so interested in doing that so we'll see...

In addition, I'll miss Reeya's Thanksgiving feast, prior to which she'll be singing songs on stage. This all takes place the day I land, I'll miss it by mere hours. Add that to the fact that my husband sent me a picture of my mom picking up Rishi at the bus stop and my mommy guilt is not subsiding because he looks so darn sad!

ameeta4As my sister and I head out for a girl's spa day, I am feeling down in the dumps and telling my sister how sad my kids are without me. Fortunately, she was checking Facebook just at that moment and shared with me a picture of Rishi and my BFF Danny at dinner on Friday night. Why didn't they text me this picture instead of the heart-tugging bus stop shot?!. Now I can go out the door feeling happy that they appear to have had a great evening, even with me halfway around the world.



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