Fredericksburg Parent

May 2016

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12 Fredericksburg Parent and Family • May 2016 SEEK FLEXIBILITY If possible, negotiate work hours or find a job that better accommodates you and your children's needs. "Finding flexible work is realistic if you are clear about what you need, how you can be successful and matching that with the business need," says Laura Wildman, a staffing con- sultant with Mom Corps, which helps match professionals who are raising young families with companies that offer flexible work conditions. As president of Mothers & More, a nation- al organization that provides community, support and programming for mothers, single mom Jill Gaikowski says she works in the evenings and on the weekends when she doesn't have her child. "I'm happy to make the trade-off because before becoming a single parent, I was a stay-at-home mom. I am lucky to have this option," Gaikowski says. Parenting is hard. Parenting kids without a partner to help can be grueling. From finding the right support to setting realistic limits, you can feel more in control and less overwhelmed. Here's how: TAP EMOTIONAL SUPPORT A positive support network is instrumental for stress management. If you don't have access to close family or friends, seek support from single parent or mothers' groups. "We have discussion groups that discuss topics pertinent to single parents," says Janet Gallinati, president of Parents without Partners, an international non-profit organization, with chapters across North America. "Sometimes all you need to do is talk about it, but there may be someone in the group who has gone through something similar." MANAGE YOUR FINANCES Many hardworking single parents struggle to make ends meet. If you qualify, numerous non-profit and government organizations are avail- able to provide assistance. Also, eliminate unnecessary bills or contact the company to see if refinancing is an option. "One of the worst things to do is to let the kids think that the only thing that has changed is that mommy or daddy has left," Gallinati says. "Explain that this is now a one-income family and cuts need to be made." SET LIMITS Say no to requests that will cause undue strain on your wallet or your time. Also, resist the urge to say yes to every activity your child wants to participate in. Make reasonable choices according to what works with your hours and available support. WRITTEN BY CHRISTA MELNYK HINES SURVIVAL TIPS for Single Parents 10

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