Issue link: https://fredparent.uberflip.com/i/1346069
www.FredericksburgParent.NET 13 Partners should be respectful and allow each other to vent or share any feelings of anxiety, isolation or loss of control. And if you happen to become frustrated with each other or the kids or any financial uncertainty that may be added to your plate? That is when clear communication and respecting everyone's needs is even more critical. No one knows what you are feeling unless you clearly share it with them. Speziale suggests "open communication using 'I statements' such as 'I feel this because…' to identify how you feel about situations and why. This pre- vents passive aggressive comments and that 'walking on an egg shell' feel- ing with those we live with." As families learn to cope with everyone being home at the same time all the time, it can also be beneficial not take everything too seriously and laugh things off, remembering that this too shall pass. Now more than ever, it is also vital to take each day as it comes instead of focusing on what will happen months from now. "Most people don't know what is currently happening and what will happen and worrying is only affecting you," Speziale says. It may be hard to take a respite from the daily grind while confined to the house, but there are ways spouses can find time to also have a little fun at home. "A lot of couples are finding new ways to enjoy their time together," says Speziale. "Some are creating a relaxing outdoor space to use and some are doing activities that they may not think about doing together such as puzzles or games. Set a time once a week to be together, on Friday night, for example, and make a routine of it," says Speziale. Other simple date night suggestions include enjoying fresh air together at a park, on a hike, or at the beach, planning a picnic together or camping out in the backyard, or even just ordering dinner in and watching your favorite TV show. Or, try whipping up a new meal together. "It can be fun for couples to plan a meal, cook together and try something new," says Sumpolec. "Active couples can go for a run or walk together in the evenings, or just get in your car and go for a drive." And if it all just becomes too much, don't be afraid to seek professional help, which is easier now through telemedicine. "I think a big part of all of this is understanding that fear, frustration, sad- ness, loneliness and a whole list of uncomfortable feelings are very real right now, and you are not alone," Speziale says. The COVID-19 pandemic has influenced every aspect of our daily lives for the past few months. Parents and children are spending more time together with less daily structure from places like school, daycare or working out- side the home. Janet Suffel, LPC, owner of Healing Hand Christian Counseling, shares her best advice for parenting children with special needs during this pandemic. She advises parents to first and foremost validate their children's feelings. "One of the things they have to do is give their children permission to have the feelings they have. So many times, I see a child who isn't allowed, for example, to get angry, or if they do, they get in trouble. It's OK to have any emotion that they're having," she says. "For example, say, 'It's OK to be mad at your sis- ter, it's not OK to hit her,' or 'It's OK to be sad but you can't spend all day in your room crying.' "If you don't validate that child's feelings…chances are they will become angrier and the next time they're going to stuff it inside and not let anyone see it. If they do that enough, that can lead to full blown depression and sui- cidal ideation." To help mitigate the effects of isolation, she tells parents to get their kids moving and outside. "Get them out of the house, even if it's just playing in the backyard. Go outside throw a ball with them. Take a walk with them," she shares. "Don't let them spend 24 hours a day on electronics. They still need to have limits on electronics. You can add a little time to pre-COVID screen time limits but make them earn it by doing an extra chore." If your child is struggling emotionally during this time, don't hesitate to get them professional help. "If you think your child is struggling extremely hard with not being able to have playdates or not being able to go out, get them help. It doesn't say 'I can't parent my child; I'll take them to this person.' It just means what your child is going through is bigger than you right now. They need someone [who] can validate their feelings and that can be one of the hardest things for a parent to do," Suffel says. How to Parent Kids with Emotional and Special Needs During COVID-19 WRITTEN BY AMY TAYLOR ...take breaks and create a safe place that includes some things that you enjoy as well as some relaxing things" " The Grainger family is featured in our ar cle photos. Mr. Joe Grainger is the Assistant Chief of Administra ve Services for Stafford County Fire and Rescue and Mrs. Lindsay Grainger is a Nurse Prac oner at Preferred Pediatrics. Their boys are Henry, William and Camden. Photos taken by M&JPhotography. View more of their work at: facebook.com/mandjphotos@melissaandjennphotography