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FAMILY VALUES Dad is Her Barometer! "He's my daddy: a waist to hug, cheek to kiss, two arms to enfold, person to encourage, strong presence to guide, nurturer who will love." — Kevin lehman Daughters gauge their self-worth, selfesteem and loveliness based on the attention and acceptance of their fathers. Embedded in every girl's psyche is a desire for her father's approval. Dad's time, encouragement and approval directly correlate to positive emotional and mental health. Girls don't care how Dad engages with them, just that he does. It is all about a relationship, not an activity. They need to hear dad's cheers from the sideline - get a hug no matter the outcome. If he appreciates her beauty, she believes she is beautiful. If he offers his love, she believes she is lovely. If he invests in her, she believes she has worth. Fathers are never perfect, but no one will hold you in higher esteem than a daughter you have lavished with love and approval. She may one day promise her love to another, but you were her first knight in shining armor and that will never change. Elaine Stone, mother of three, lives in Spotsylvania. Write: elainestone@juno.com Dad & Daughter Time Together Whatever you can do with a son, you can do with a daughter. In most cases, she will be so pleased to have you to herself that she won't care what you are doing together. And if a particular activity seems not to thrill her, try something else. But take heart: this can be the start of a whole new approach to your role as a father — an approach that ultimately will be more rewarding, refreshing and gratifying than you ever imagined. 1. Do you spend uninterrupted and focused time alone with your daughter? 2. Do you take your daughter fishing? To sports events? Camping? 3. Have you taken your daughter to your workplace to show her what you do? 4. Do you discuss the nature of the business or professional worlds with your daughter? 5. Do you discuss finances and investments with your daughter? 6. Do you take your daughter with you on Saturdays to do "male-type" errands; auto-parts store, the local dump and the hardware store? 7. Do you teach her how to fix things? 8. Do you attend your daughter's extracurricular activities? www.fredericksburgparent.NET 27